This page is a start ... I suppose.
Fire in the VAN! March 24/99
Our van had a fire in the electrical system. Donna says she's never seen me move that fast. It was really exciting. A light came on the dash indicating the batteries weren't charging and the next thing we knew the van was full of plastic smoke! The electrical harness was melting down! I stopped the van and shouted at Donna, "GET OUT!!!" Following her was my seat & the tool box! I turned the motor off but it shorted the starter into starting again while I was trying to undo the batteries ( it takes two to start this thing). All the while I'm gagging on the smoke! Finally (actually just in time!) I got the batteries undone and the smoke stopped. I went into a deep but calm shock for about 3 days while I worked on the repairs with our mechanic. He said that my quick and clear actions stopped it just before it burst into flames devouring all we have. The damage was close to being bad, but didn't cross that line ... all is OK. In fact with our "miracle mechanic" it ended up costing only 200F! Funny thing, when we woke the next morning to see where we were (we just slept there that night for couldn't move without lights) it was in front of the "Centre de Secour", better known in the US as the “volunteer fire department”.
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What to Do on a Rainy Day? August 2/99
The other day we were driving to meet a friend. It was raining. The chemical toilet in our camping car was due to be emptied, and as we had time, we pulled up to a public toilet outside a campground. As I was attending to the business I had set out to do, I heard lots of different voices in the women’s room. Men’ s and women’s voices, and children! Donna spotted a man entering with a baguette. “Fromage ou pâté?” one voice continued to demand. “Fromage ou pâté!?!” even more insistent! Ah, but the French do love their picnics, but I never would have thought of stopping at a public toilet for one!
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A Special Birthday Dinner Show! July 10/99
We played a "cheesy little dive", normally a karaoke bar, in Luçon on Lance's birthday. A fight broke out as we ate. Nothing serious, just a push and shove, tables and chairs went tumbling. It was quite the dinner show for us, especially when the false teeth went flying across the room!
The Road to Memphis June 19/99
We played a small town (Brossac, FR) for Fete de La Musique, a day devoted to music all over France. During intermission, a man came up to Donna and asked “Are you really from Nashville?”
“We sure are!” She replied.
“Well, do you know the road to Memphis?” he asked.
“Sure, I-40!” She replied.
“No, I mean the song by Eddy Mitchell.” He said.
So he came over to me and asked, “Are you really from Nashville?”
“We sure are!” I replied.
“Well, do you know the road to Memphis?” he asked.
“Sure, I-40!” I said.
Then he got this funny look and said, “Oh.”
This wasn’t planned, it’s just the way it was.
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Laundry Stories
Donna gets to do laundry in interesting places all over the world. One of the more memorable times lately was in Chillac, France overlooking a beautiful rolling hillside accented by multicolored fields and a 13th century castle.
And the band played on
Sometimes I’m not sure if I should write some stories, but there are karmic lessons in them for example:
We were playing in a bar in the oceanside town of La Tranche sur Mer, FR. We’ve played here many times, and every time has been good. Mostly young people on holiday learning how to windsurf, drink lots of alcohol, make new friends. On this particular evening the crowd was especially rocking, perhaps because of the total eclipse of the sun just days before, or just ... because. As we were ripping into our third and final set for the evening, the waiter discovers that a couple in the back booth are not only petting heavily but are full on stroking! Yes, doing the thing that people normally don’t do in public but normally tend to opt for more private surroundings. The waiter strongly suggested that this was not really the time or place for such activities as this is a bar and even young children were attending the concert. The young man of the couple replied that this was his business to do as he pleased and anyway he had bought the girl so many drinks that she was sure to pass out soon and he would loose his investment and possibilities for the evening. They continued as the girls eyes rolled about in that unfocused fashion often seen in the late hours of bars. Carpe Diem. The frustrated waiter replied that his “karma” would get him if he continued this activity. In an act of total defiance, the young man pulled the wavering young girl to his lips and they began a deep soul kiss. Her eyes opened a bit, her body convulsed and suddenly the young man’s mouth was filled with the contents of all the dinner and drinks he had bought her that evening in hopes of fulfilling his desires. I don’t think that was the return he was hoping for.
And the band played on.
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Well, a mistake was made.
We announced November 18 at the "Bottleneck" that we would be playing next December 18 at the "Bottleneck".
While this is true ... it is NOT THE SAME BOTTLENECK !!!
December 18 we will be playing at the "Bottleneck" in Berneuil, France (16)
The confusion began when Christophe (the manager of the "Bottleneck" in Berneuil) called to book us. I apparently didn't hear the Berneuil part, knowing well the "Bottleneck" in Paris and the manager by the same name ... Christophe.
When I had a question about a message (from "Christophe of the 'Bottleneck'" on the answering machine, I called Christophe (the manager of the "Bottleneck" ... in Paris) who was puzzled and said he had not called. ?
He said he was worried that maybe he was cracking under the pressure of living in Paris and that maybe it was nearing time to look for that place in the country. We were beginning to think maybe it was going to be the "Funny Farm!"
O.K.
Later the phone rang and it was Christophe who told me yes, he had called so we discussed the logistics of playing the 18th of December. "Sure, no problem."
After our concert on 18 November, I announced that we would be playing next December 18 at the "Bottleneck".
After everyone left, Christophe told me he couldn't have booked us for that day as he's not even open on Saturday!
Aweek or more later we got another message from Christophe (the manager of the "Bottleneck" in Berneuil) and at last the mystery was solved!!! I called Christophe (the manager of the "Bottleneck" in Paris)
who was relieved to find his sanity a little more intact than any of us had previously begun to believe.
So, as we began to work on the new van the weather began to become more cold. Donna says, "Turn on the heater." Unfortunately, as hard as we'd been working on making the van livable, we still hadn't finished installing the heating system. She wasn't happy. We continued our search for the parts to vent the furnace and possibly (by this time) have someone install it. After many 'dead ends' someone else told us about a nice man who does this sort of thing, and not too expensive. When we arrived in all the ... glory, of this monster under construction, he really didn't want to be bothered with it. He didn't speak much English, but the lady at the detailing shop next door did. I told him "No problem, I can do the work, if I could borrow the drill and just get some advice." He was really dragging his feet, but Donna had begun speaking to the lady at the detailing shop and after the neighbor "put the word on him" he begrudgingly agreed to help. Appearently, she had been married to a US military man. Donna told her all about us. She said she loved the blues and wanted to buy our CD. No prob, thanks! She and Donna continued to talk while I struggled with the installation.
It was an interesting instalation. He let me borrow a drill, but he didn't have the right bit. Between drilling, filing, tugging, ripping, and at last, using a P90 military can opener, I got the hole for the vent to be the right size. Installed and ready to roll we payed and said goodbye.
It takes a few minutes (2 or 3) for us to move this thing safely and in this time the lady and he had begun to talk,
"So, did you get a CD, too?"
"CD?"
"Yeah, they're blues musicians ..."
That must have been all he heard, but it was enough!
Before we could back out of his area, He was banging on the door of the van "Hey, you're blues musicians! Open up!"
There he was with a guitar wanting to buy a CD and have me play him a song.
I played him a little bit of some John Lee Hooker and the man was so touched, he burst into tears!
Reaching into his car he pulled out his John Lee Hooker song book.
After that, he didn't want us to leave!
It's the old, "Can't judge a book by looking at the cover!
L sept/01
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